hey!
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I'm Sam, your local nonbinary-ish silly with adhd
My fav. characters are Angel Dust + Husk
You may use she/her or they/them for me
i have anger issues. bare with me please if I get a little too pissed off or carried away.
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i love how that the only time I lied about my age was today because of some creep fucking sexually assaulting me today on roblox because I wanted them to go away
I said I was 10 but im not 10 im older.
don't ever believe me if I say im 10 or younger im just making an excuse to get out of an situation💀
i love showcasing my art sm
i read every comment I get on my art n reply to em I love to get positive comments so much you guys don't know how much it means to me knowing people like my art ❤️
i used to be insecure abt my art until now, positive comments n likes n favorites helped me feel more proud of my drawings then i used to
all i have to say is, tysm for making me feel more positive about my drawings. 🥺❤️...
i would've stopped drawing and give up a long ass time ago without y'all
continuing on from my vent...
i feel like the person im trying to help get better is just lying, guilt tripping, and using me
I give her gifts, since my mom used to allow me to buy stuff for her and now she keeps on asking for stuff that I cant afford due to lack to money atm, and my mom KNOWS she is rich enough to buy the stuff she asks me for
plus she cant even give me a gift without ME asking her after all I've fucking done for her
she says her moms in jail, proceeds to be able to call her WHILE SHES IN JAIL, SERVING at least 8 OR 4 YEARS IN PRISON FOR QUOTE ON QUOTE "ABUSE"
and her MOM CAN PICK HER UP FROM SCHOOL??
says she loves her mom as well, and her mom even seems like an nice mom from what me and my mom has seen when she picked her daughter up from my house after hanging out with me
keeps on talking about buying razor blades n shit n telling me how much she got / bought, and even GRABBED ONE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CAFETERIA, had to FUCKING THROW IT AWAY cuz I was GENUINELY WORRIED
she was afraid i'd leave her, but I promised I wouldn't. i want to, because I feel like my mom was right about EVERYTHING she said about her, but I cant break an fucking promise or else it'll make me look like an shitty person, especially to somebody with depression
plus sometimes at school she'd hit me n shit, for an joke. which I clearly didn't like, once she hit me on my arm when she got all pissed off at me because I said I was getting checked out on that day and it hurt- I didn't say it though because I didn't want to worry her
i feel drained.
every day theres a problem with somebody and im expected to be the therapist everybody sees me as, and if I don't I feel like I'm a fucking heartless asshole and might get seen in that way as well by everybody and fucking lose all my friends because of it then feel lonely like I did back in elementary
but both me and you know its fucking just mentally draining me in the process to just be the better person and try my best to help everybody mentally
im so tired of constantly helping somebody that doesn't even have the energy or care to even help themselves
they want to get better, but then proceed to make everything worse for themself by fucking harming themselves, attempting to off them selves, etc. etc.
im done. i don't wanna do this anymore. trust me. i WANT to be the greatest friend as possible as I can to everybody but I feel like giving up atp
no matter what I do, try to convince somebody to not attempt on offing them self, to not harm themselves, they proceed to fucking do it anyways
Im such a failure I failed on being the therapist for everybody, okay?
I'm done.
deleting this when I feel better because I might get harassed or some shit
btw, sorry for just randomly dumping this vent I just feel stressed